Tuesday, January 6, 2009

SUMMER CLASSES FOR MEN

SUMMER CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE "LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS"

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED BY September 30,2007

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS,

CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

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Class 1

How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays.

Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.

Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

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Class 2

The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?

Round Table Discussion.

Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 p.m. For 2 hours.

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Class 3

Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?

Group Practice.

Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

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Class 4

Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor.

Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

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Class 5

After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?

Examples on Video.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

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Class 6

Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.

Help Line Support and Support Groups.

Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

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Class 7

Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places and Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.

Open Forum.

Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

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Class 8

Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.

Graphics and Audio Tapes.

Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

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Class 9

Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost.

Real Life Testimonials.

Tuesdays at 6:00 P.M. - Location to be determined.

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Class 10

Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?

Driving Simulations.

4 weeks, Saturdays at noon, 2 hours.

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Class 11

Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.

Online Classes and role-playing .

Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.

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Class 12

How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion:

Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.

Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

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Class 13

How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries, Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.

Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.

Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

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Class 14

The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.

Live Demonstration.

Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

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Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors!

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